Sunday, May 3, 2009

Difference!

What a difference a month can make! I have been thinking about this post for a few weeks but havent spent the time to actually put into words what Ive been feeling.
The change that Malia and I have made connection wise has been amazing in the last month. I have always known from the time she got here that she had a wall up with me and each month or even each week bits and pieces have come down. But since her 6 month mark it has been so neat to have her run to me instead of Rich or to want to sit on my lap other than to just read books. Normally Malia is not a snuggly baby but this last month has totally changed, she will just sit on my lap for long periods of time just to hang out with me and turn into my neck and nuzzle and squeal with delight and laughter, she is constantly telling me up up up. This last week has been so nice in that she has wanted me to constantly hold her... gets a little old after a couple hours of crying every time I have to put her down but I cant help but grin at her whining to get back up up up! I kept waiting for her to get sick this last week because she has been soooo clingy but I think she is just really loving some mom time and when Im neglecting her while cleaning or cooking she gets pretty ticked! Its annoying and awesome all at the same time! She cries every time I leave the house now, if she sees me getting my shoes on she immediately starts saying jacket and shoes and up wanting to come with me and when I dont get them for her she realizes Im going without her and throws quite the tantrum.. again awesome!!
We were sitting on the couch this week just hanging out when I caught our reflection in the tv and I got all teary eyed.. I felt such closeness and so much love for her it was almost overwhelming.. to think back not that long ago that she was in a different world and so far and then not so long ago the distance she kept us at and then now to have her just whole heartedly wanting my attention and giving hugs and kisses and saying momma all the time just melted my heart. And then to top it off we have court on Tuesday so that nobody can ever take her away from us!
Gives me the chills just thinking about it! It was a year ago that we saw her sweet little photo and knew that she was meant to be ours and was praying and waiting for the call that they had accepted us for her. She is an amazing little girl and makes everyone smile, she is such a sass but comes by that naturally! She is so scary smart and sweet. I need to get my camera out and get all her learning genius on camera. She has pooped on the potty lots of times now and has even been going to the bathroom door when she needs to poop (no pee pees yet though) but as long as Im paying attention it almost never fails, if she needs to go she will!

So this is going to be a very important week for us, we have court and then have family coming in town to do the church stuff with us and celebrate our finalization! Its gonna be a long busy week but I cant wait! I feel so entirely blessed that Malia has decided that she can trust me and I love her so so much that I cant believe that she didnt come from me, like really when I sit and think about it the feelings between Kaden and Maddie and Malia are no different, it shouldnt surprise me but I know that she was made in heaven for us.. sounds corny but I cant even express how much I love her and how nondifferent my love is for her, I sit there and think really that phrase born in your hearth is so true... I know truly she was meant to be with us and I think often of her birth mother and hope that in her heart she feels the comfort I pray for her to have that Malia is so loved and wanted and what a remarkably hard but wonderful choice she made for this sweet girl!
So I might not post to much.. I will for SURE get some court pics up.. her dress is to die for! LOVE IT!! So we will be busy but I will try to update.. also stay tuned for info on my sis doing glitter nails while she is in town... she is awesome and the toes are sooo cute! So more on that maybe tomorrow!
My other sweet girl!

Love her in curls! And doesnt she have the most perfect teeth!


Not such a great pic of my BUT I love Maddies face in this one
ok I have been on the hunt for panties for Malia and cant find a small enough size but I had to buy these... isnt that chunky monkey tooshie the best!!!
This was after going potty and trying on her panties and she wasnt sure how she felt
though she did start doing a dance
A few days I put a french braid in her hair.. ya her hair is that long!
My littls sassy girl!
Close up of the braid, that side stayed in all day (its her longer side) even through a nap!!

6 comments:

Tirsa said...

I love reading about your bonding and how well she is doing. I also love reading about how much you love your little girl and truly, I understand exactly what you are saying about the nondifference between your bio kids and adopting. I haven't had a bio kid yet but I do know that when this little one is born, my love for her will not differ than my love for Bella and Ez because just like you said, they were all meant for us and Heavenly Father always knew where each one of his kids are meant to be. Our families were created first in heaven and whether born of our heart or body, it is the same!

Also, love that pic of you and Malia kissing. Can't wait to see the pics from court and the dresses.

And, I am your VT again. Yay!

Angela said...

I too really love that picture of you and Malia kissing! What a neat keepsake to have. I am glad that you feel like you are bonding to her too. She is a cutie pie and I love seeing all the great pictures you take! Oh-- and her braids are darling!

tamiz said...

YAY the braids are awesome! I'm so glad she's lovin' on Mom now. After all your sacrifices and efforts you deserve it! LOVE the panty bum! So stinkin' cute!

Erica said...

This is truly a very exciting week for you. Malia is a real blessing to your family- I am happy that the Lord made things possible for her to join your family. It was suppose to be that way!

Haley L said...

Getting to see even just a glimpse of her bond with you on Saturday was pretty special. She speaks so dang clearly, which blows me away since all she heard for the first year of her life was Korean. I loved hearing her say "UP" over and over again. :)

Elizabeth said...

I loved all the darling pics..and the one of you and Malia is just precious. It is so wonderful that you finally feel the love she has for you. Can't wait for your awesome week! and to see your darling pics of the dresses..:)How fun to have braids! She is so dang cute!