Monday, March 16, 2009

Choosing my battles

First off this is my most favorite pic of Maddie. Im not sure why but I just love it, she just looks so chill. I have had a hard time photographing her for a few months because she has started the fake smile, so I find myself not posting as much of her lately. Shes usually so natural with the camera so I hope she drops the cheese!!
So the last couple of weeks Maddie and I have been battling... not fighting really at all but there is a unspoken war. She being the 5 going on 15 year old has chosen her daddy as the favorite and so if we are speaking she always takes his side... even if there really isnt a side to take. This Im fine with I didnt grow up with a good father figure so I love that she loves her daddy and that they have such a great relationship BUT I will admit that sometimes I get my feelers hurt.
She has been a little quick with her tongue (I have NO idea where she gets that!) and has said some things that are hurtful or snotty even though I know she doesnt mean anything hurtful Ive been trying to get her to realize they are. The other day she was telling one of my friends how pretty she was and then spouted out that she wished she was her mom...... um SMACK right in my gut, I tried to ignore it because I knew it had nothing to do with me she just really loves giving others compliments but I had to let her know it hurt my feelings and to be careful what she says. Well then on Friday she wanted to go get her nails done but needed to change clothes and only wanted Rich's help so I had a melt down and said FINE than Im not taking you and off I went pouting to my room... ya Im a baby sometimes! So here comes Rich playing peace maker and I had to laugh, here she is only 5 and he is already having to patch things up between us. So I pulled myself together explained to her that she was acting snotty and hurting my feelings and then off we went to get our nails done and a slushy at the new 7 eleven!! We had a great time, I love hanging out with Maddie she is a great pal and so much like I was when I was little... always the peacemaker always making people feel good and way more outgoing than I ever was BUT Im seeing little signs of our future so Im trying to keep my own emotions in check and choosing my battles in hopes of keeping our relationship strong so that when she is a teen we will hopefully not be needing Rich as a full time ref!

Dang isnt she sweet!! And gorgeous!!


Erica said...

I'm telling you- that little girl is the cutest thing ever! All I can say is- this is why Jamey and I are happy that this next baby is a boy. I was a good kid too, but man did I fight with my mom. I just didn't want a girl that would fight with me the way I fought with my mom.

Alison said...

I too have been having my issues with K over the past year especially. Kudos to you for having 2 daughters!!

Tirsa said...

I think the mother/daughter relationship is one of the most complicated. I know mine with my mom certainly is and I hope so badly that somehow I can navigate my relationship with Bella better. But, I know what you mean about them hurting our feelings. Just the other day Bella told me I'm too fat for my clothes. Ouch, even if I have a good reason to be getting fat, that still hurt!

Maddie is super duper cute!

Elizabeth said...

Love your pictures of Maddie. She is so dang cute! Glad you got ot spend time with Maddie and get your nails done. I am sure when she is older she will thank you for being such a great mom and friend to her.

Haley L said...

With all the joys of having girls comes all the challenges associated with estrogen! You are not alone, sista! We might have to start a support group when all these girls are teenagers. I know I'm doomed! Love the pic of Maddie as well!

Kristi said...

That top photo is absolutely gorgeous.

And I think it's really helpful for our daughters to know that their words have power -- for both good and bad. I think sometimes they just need to be reminded that they can hurt someone's feeling with what they say.